May 31, 2012

For many this day came and went without thought, but for me and my family this wasn't an easy day. For you see, it was on this day that I was due to give birth to our second child. A child we had hoped would be another little girl whom we were going to name Carolina Grace. A child whom we were excited, nervous, scared and hopeful about bringing into this world. But in October, it was taken from us. Little did we know at that time, that months later we would be smack in the middle of moving states, finishing up school years, living apart from each other, and beginning a new journey. Perhaps God knew that was best. Maybe this timing just wasn't for us. I often think back and I know that God is in COMPLETE control. But my heart is torn. Do we try to have another baby? Do we just sit back and be thankful for the one amazing child we do have? What is it that God wants us to do with our family? Does He plan for us to have more children or not? I pray that my heart will be calm and still and that I will be able to listen for His voice so that I can know the plans He has for me.

But that wasn't all that happened on this day. My dear sweet grandfather, my dad's dad, went to be with the Lord on this day. He was 89 years old and only 2 months shy of his 90th birthday.

This is my grandpa, Calloway, my dad, and I in 2008. 

Here is our whole family at the Sargent Family reunion in 2008. 

And our whole family again at Christmas in 2008. 

This is when we visited my grandpa at the nursing home.

These are the only pictures that I could find of him but I know my parents have more. He was a really neat man. He served in the Army during WWII and was trianed in anti-aircraft gunnery, field artillery, Carbine rifles, and side arms. He trained other officers and fought in the Battle of the Bulge and many others. After the war ended he stayed in Germany to guard POW's at Frankfurt. He was awarded 3 bronze stars, and many of medals and awards including a Good Conduct Medal. He earned the rank of Corporal. He loved gardening, farming, and raising cows and chickens. He used to work for the Arkansas State Forestry Service until a tree fell on his back. He was a deacon in his church and a Sunday School Teacher. He and my grandmother were married 59 years.

What a legacy to leave behind!

He was also a funny guy. He enjoyed teasing my sister and me. He loved to try and get us all riled up. Every time we got to their house, he'd meet us at the door and count us off in German: eins, swei, drei....but for some reason, he never counted my dad, only us ladies. As a kid I always got tired of hearing him do that but now that's the first thing I remember about him. He used to pour coffee on his fried eggs at breakfast and I thought that was the most disgusting thing ever. I also remember as a young girl about the age of 1st grade he began saying that I reminded him of Whitney Houston. At the time I didn't really know who she was other than the fact that she was famous. I was secretly on cloud on nine! Once I learned that she was a black lady, I wondered what in the world my grandpa was thinking......how could I remind him of her. Had he seen her? My grandpa was always taking us out in the garden to get vegetables when we were little. As we grew older I remember that every year at Thanksgiving Grandpa would always sneak the big ole turkey leg onto one of our plates, oh we hated that and he would just cackle and laugh. My grandpa didn't really laugh it really was more of a cackle. And sometimes he'd even get tickled at himself. When we were teenagers he'd always ask us about boys and tease us about them. One of my favorite memories is when my sister and I were about 6-9 years old he had taken us fishing at one of the ponds on the farm and Libby had casted her rod out and something bit onto her line. Well whatever it was, it was big. Grandpa had to drop his fishing pole to help Libby reel hers in. Libby and I were so excited and squealing because we thought she had caught a huge fish but when Grandpa got in, it was a big ol' snapping turtle. The turtle ended up biting her line and getting away but Grandpa laughed about that for years and teased Libby too.

I'm lucky to have had him for all these years. Most people aren't lucky enough to get to spend 31 years with their grandparents. Too bad we didn't live closer to him all those years. I'm sure he would've had me out there on that farm doing who knows what and gettin' cow poop all over me.

But despite all of the sadness that there was on this day, I have joy in my heart because I know that that little baby that was inside me is in heaven and that my grandpa is there with Jesus and he isn't suffering any more. He is dancing around, praising God, and probably giving all of the little girls in heaven a hard time just like he did me and my sister.  But someday, I'm going to see him again!